你们学校实施过的最愚蠢的校规是什么？_风闻

【来源龙腾网】

评论原创翻译：

JoannAzary

Conservative Christian College. A group of us played Age of Empires one weekend. They didn’t like it and called a meeting. Everyone involved got misdemeanors on their records. There was nothing in the handbook about it being against the rules. The only person that didn’t get any punishment was the son of the president even though he was just as involved as the rest of us. Was quite interesting explaining the write up on my record when I transferred. “You got a misdemeanor for what?!”

保守派的基督教大学。我们几个人周末玩帝国时代。他们不太喜欢，叫我们去喝茶。每个人的档案上都被记过了。学校手册里根本没有相关的规定。唯一没有受到任何处罚的是校长的儿子，即便他和我们一样参与了。转校的时候跟别人解释档案里的这件事还挺有意思的。“你被记过的原因是啥？！”

XenonNade

Next time play DOOM. If they say shit then just argue that DOOM is the most Christian game to exist

下次玩毁灭战士吧。他们要是逼逼，你就说毁灭战士是世界上最基督教的游戏。

alurkerwhomannedup

Yup. DOOM and Diablo are massively Christian - fucking up the spawns of Hell and Satan himself are something God would approve of

没错。毁灭战士和暗黑破坏神太基督教了——把一群地狱的怪物和撒旦本身干出屎来绝对是上帝会允许的事情。

latvian_username

Closing boys toilets, because some cunt was stealing toilet paper. When school staff announced this stupid rule, some students actually threatned to shit on the tables then.

关停男生厕所，因为有人偷厕纸。校方宣布这条规定的时候，有学生威胁他们说要在课桌上拉屎。

boht-jayaz69

My school made it compulsory to wear uniform in online classes

我的学校强制我们上网课的时候穿校服。

Spetnaz14

All mine said was wear clothes

我们说穿衣服就行

Disastrous-Actuary31

I wasn’t allowed to test my blood sugar in class (type 1 diabetic). Some teachers didn’t care but most made a fuss about it. “Go to the nurses office if you need to do that, it’s a distraction to everybody and other students might get freaked out by the needles” even though it was just a little prick that nobody could ever even see, and none of my classmates ever complained.

他们不让我在班级里测血糖（一型糖尿病）。有的老师不在乎，但绝大多数都跟我搞事。“假如你需要的话去医务室，这样会让别人分心，并且其他学生可能会被针头吓到”，但针头别人都看不见，并且根本没有同学跟我抱怨。

Told my parents about the rule, my dad got furious and told me to do it anyways, and that I have absolutely nothing to worry about as far as getting in trouble at home goes. So to me, this was free reign to stick it to the fuckers at school. I tested every class, more than I needed to, just to spite them. Eventually I got sent to the office and my principal called my dad. Dad showed up, and I’ve barely ever seen him as furious as he was that day. He was cursing, yelling, tearing papers off of walls.

跟我家长说了这个规矩，我爸爸很生气，告诉我啥都别管就是干，我根本没有需要担心的，后果顶多和在家惹事一样。所以这对我来说，意思就是我可以在学校爱他妈怎么扎怎么扎了。我每堂课都测一遍，比我需要的次数还多，就是为了气他们。最后我被送到了办公室，校长给我爸打了电话，我几乎从来没见过他像那天一样生气过。他在骂人，在大喊，在从墙上撕纸。

I was never, ever, ever bothered about it again.

我从此之后再也没因为这件事被别人烦过。

SlavicSquat1234

My primary school had this wierd obsession with safety. When we played dodgeball the boys had to throw with their non-dominant hand while the girls got to throw full force. And we could get detention for going where the teachers couldn’t see us. But the worst rule by far was that we weren’t allowed to run on the playground, I’ll never forget the time my teacher literally said, “the playground is no place to run.”

我的小学对安全有一种诡异的执念。我们玩躲避球的时候，男生只能用非惯用手扔球，而女生可以全力扔。要是去老师看不见的地方，我们会被留堂。一直很喜欢老师的一句话，“操场不是给你们跑的地方”。

RedheadedRobin

“Don’t damage school property” sounds reasonable enough until you get detention for staining a chair after suddenly getting your period.

“不许损坏学校财产”，听起来很合理，除非你因为突然来月经把椅子弄脏而被留堂。

Sfinktar

My school banned water bottles.

我的学校把水瓶给禁了。

A water drinking fad started at my school, mostly among girls, and soon all of them were walking around carrying plastic purified water bottles from the major brands. They all wanted to look health conscious and cool.

我们学校突然开始了一种喝水的潮流，基本都是女孩子之间，于是没过多久，每个人都会手里拿着一瓶大品牌的塑料纯净水瓶到处走。他们想要让自己看起来注意健康，并且很酷。

Eventually the guys jumped onboard the fad and brought even larger water containers to school. One guy brought a baggage trolley to school on which he transported a 20L industrial water dispenser bottle.

到最后男生也加入了，他们开始往学校带更大的容器。有个男生推了一辆行李手推车到学校，里面装着一个20升的工业用储水罐。

At this point the principal had had enough. It was a posh, image conscious school with fancy uniforms and he didn’t like seeing the students all lugging around big plastic jugs of water, looking like homeless people. So he he banned any and all water bottles from school and told the students to drink water from the bathroom taps and other drinking fountains.

到此为止，校长被恶心够了。我们是个高端，注重形象的学校，校服也很上档次，他不太喜欢看着学生们拖着巨型水瓶子到处走，跟流浪汉似的。于是他把所有的水瓶都禁了，让学生们去洗手间的水龙头和其他饮水处喝水。

This is dumb because drinking water regularly is healthy. He could have simply banned all bottles over 750ml and could have simply told us to keep the bottles hidden away in our bags and out of sight when walking around between classes.

这很蠢，因为经常喝水本来是有利健康的。他本来可以把所有超过750毫升的水瓶给禁掉，可以让我们在课间到处走的时候把水瓶放到背包里不到处显摆。

METHlun

the guy with the 20 L bottle sounds like a fun dude

那个推着20升水罐的哥们听起来是个有趣的人。

alistofthingsIhate

‘I’m more hydrated than you, loser.’

“我补水比你更厉害，loser。”

Weird flex but okay.

有点怪，不过还行。

Tight-Try1908

“No body armor of any kind”-The fuck was we gonna get body armor? Most of us barley could afford to go to school. The fact that this was a rule also makes me wonder what the fuck happened to make them institute this.

“不允许身着任何护甲”——我们他妈上哪儿整护甲啊？我们上学都快上不起了。这条竟然被写成校规，我也想不出来究竟他妈发生了什么，让他们把这个写成校规。

Xerokine

Maybe a kid showed up in full medi style plate armor and it was really loud.

或许有个孩子穿着一整套中世纪板甲，叮里咣啷的很响。

sharkbisc

No coloured bras. I went to an all-girls school and we wore uniforms and the top was a light colour and very see-through for some reason (so it was easy to tell if you had a pink bra on for example). The weird thing was it was always the male teachers who called students out for breaking this rule…. yikes

不许穿彩色的胸罩。我上的是女校，穿统一的校服，上装是浅色并且由于某种原因很透的衣服（因此很容易看出你穿的是粉色的胸罩）。最怪的是那些因为学生违反这条校规把学生叫出来的老师都是男老师……噫。

If you’re 45 minutes or more late to class (90 minute blocks), it’s an absence, otherwise it’s a tardy.

假如你迟到45分钟及以上（90分钟大课），就算你缺席，否则算迟到。

If you get 3 tardies, that is one unexcused absence.

迟到3次，算一次无理由旷课。

If you get 20 unexcused absences, you automatically fail the class.

无理由旷课20次，这门课你就挂了。

Cpt_Trilby

So you and a friend showed up to class together, late, and very sweaty. And when your teacher asked you just laughed? I’d bet $50 your teacher though you were fucking before class.

所以你和你的一个朋友同时出现在课堂门口，迟到了，并且浑身是汗。你老师问你们去干什么了，你们只是笑笑？我赌50块，你老师会觉得你俩课前在打炮。

Diet_Coke

I’d bet $50 your teacher though you were fucking before class.

引用：“我赌50块，你老师会觉得你俩课前在打炮。”

HiopXenophil

School: makes overly complicated absentee rules

学校：制定过度复杂的翘课规则

Nerds: You underestimate my powers

学霸：你低估了我的实力

I swear if I was questioning any faith I had, that school sure made me not wanna have anything to do with any religious institution ever again.

我发誓假如我有任何宗教信仰的话，那所学校绝对让我以后不想与任何宗教机构产生任何关系。

acjgoblu

No sniffing the markers. Then why do they smell great!?

不许闻马克笔。那干嘛把马克笔做得那么好闻啊？！

Unable_Freedom5564

Get a hour detention if you didn’t have a rubber, happened to me

没带橡皮的话留堂一小时。我干过。