你见过的最有妄想症的人是谁？_风闻

【来源龙腾网】

评论原创翻译：

Who is the most delusional person you have met?

你见过的最有妄想症的人是谁？

ImCaffeinated_Chris

A REALLY rich woman who never worked a day in her life. Married for $$. This was said by her not jokingly. She never joked. As we are driving thru the city…

一个非常富有的女人，从未工作过一天。她亲口说结婚只是为了钱，不是开玩笑。她从不开玩笑，当我们开车穿过城市时..她说。

“The problem with the homeless is they just don’’t know how to budget.”

“无家可归者的问题在于，他们不知道如何做预算。”

Her purse was probably worth more money than the homeless see in a year. She was completely disconnected from reality and living in her own little mega rich world.

她的钱包可能比那些无家可归的人一年挣的钱还要多。她完全脱离了现实，生活在她自己的小巨富世界里。

quarantinethoughts

My white friend once said out of nowhere, “Black people have all those problems because they just don’t do anything to help themselves.”

我的白人朋友有一次突然说: “黑人之所以有这些问题，是因为他们没有任何上进心。”

FrogginBullfish_ 

I once met someone who was convinced that he was a werewolf. I thought he was kidding until he started hardcore trying to get me to agree that he was a werewolf. Years later I ran into him and he was going on about how good weed smells like flowers.

我曾经遇到过一个人，他坚信自己是个狼人。我以为他是在开玩笑，直到他开始硬要我承认他是个狼人。几年后，我偶然遇到他，他一直在说大麻闻起来像花一样香。

Edit: That’’s actually tied with someone I met who thought he was “a psychic vampire” who could also control animals to some degree.

编辑: 这实际上与我认识的一个人有关，他认为自己是“通灵的吸血鬼” ，在某种程度上还能控制动物。

Tesla__Coil 

I bet you could have some fun by introducing the vampire and the werewolf to each other.

你可以把声称自己是吸血鬼和狼人的两个人介绍认识一下，肯定会很有趣。

TheFriendlyDrunks 

He turned into a Weedwolf

然后他就变成了一只野狼

throwawaytrumper

I mean, people do call the buds “flower” sometimes, and I’ve smelled weed that smelled like citrus, or pine, or really skunky. None yet that smell like roses, but I wouldn’t be shocked.

我的意思是，有时候人们确实把花蕾叫做“花朵” ，而且我闻到过杂草的味道，闻起来像柑橘，松树，或者是臭鼬。没有一个闻起来像玫瑰，但你能闻出来，我也不会感到震惊。

原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译：ycb1990 转载请注明出处

joan_wilder 

was he a waswolf or a werewolf? big difference.

他到底是狼还是狼人? 两个差别很大。

slapdashbr 

Years later I ran into him and he was going on about how good weed smells like flowers.

几年后，我偶然遇到他，他一直在说大麻闻起来像花一样香。

I mean that seems like a perfectly normal comment

我的意思是，这似乎是一个完全正常的评论

I like the flowery/citrusy smelling weed

我喜欢闻野草的花香

Kloc34

Well it’s because he IS a werewolf ! Damnit why don’t you agree ? Sincerely, a werewolf

那是因为他是个狼人! 该死的，你为什么就不能同意他就是一个狼人呢?

thisbilIgates

One of my friends had rich parents. She thought everything cost waaay more than it did. She forgot a lunch and so I shared some of mine. She “paid me back” $20 the next day for like a banana and half a sandwich. This happened several times until I just started bringing two lunches. She paid me $30 a meal for months.

我的一个朋友的父母很有钱。她认为每样东西定价都太低了。有一次她忘了吃午饭，所以我把我的午饭分享了一点给她。第二天，她为了一根香蕉和半个三明治“还了我”20美元。 这种情况发生了好几次，直到我开始带两份午餐，其中一份午餐给她。她连续几个月每顿饭都付给我30美元。

Then her parents found out. Instead of being upset, they asked me to do the same for her younger brother. I made more money those two years in high-school than I do at my full time job now.

然后她的父母发现了。他们没有生气，而是让我为她的弟弟也带一份午餐。我在高中那两年挣的钱比我现在全职工作挣的钱还多。

anonymous6494 

I mean it’’s one banana Michael. What could it cost, $10?

我是说就一根香蕉，迈克尔，能值多少钱，10美元？

Astyyria 

My boyfriend’s parents are fairly well off. They almost exclusively eat take out or fast food. Because of this, my boyfriend always assumed that groceries were super expensive and cost way more than take out. I actually had to make a chart to break down the cost of groceries and have the aid of several friends to convince him that groceries were cheaper. He just couldn’t comprehend that spending $10-$20 per person on one meal was somehow more expensive than a weeks worth of groceries. He eventually got it thankfully.

我男朋友的父母相当富裕。他们几乎只吃外卖和快餐。正因为如此，我的男朋友总是认为食品杂货买的东西超级贵，而且比外卖贵得多。最后，我不得不制作一个图表来分析食品杂货的成本，并且得到几个朋友的帮助来说服他食品杂货更便宜。 他只是不能理解每人平均一顿饭上花费10-20美元竟然比在杂货店买一个星期的食物还要贵。 谢天谢地，他终于明白了。

yankonapc

That is really bizarre. What did your parents think about you making and bringing 3 lunches to school every day? Presumably you bought your own ingredients, or gave some of your profits to your mum?

这真是太奇怪了。你的父母是怎么看待你每天要做三顿午餐带到学校的？你是自己偷偷买了配料，还是把利润分给了一点给你妈妈？

babautz

Maybe its a language barrier thing, but that wouldnt be what I call delusional. Detached maybe, but when they are rich, $5 or $20 is a completely negible difference to them. And at least they felt the need to pay you back, displaying some amount of decency?

也许这是一种语言障碍，但这不是我所说的妄想症。当他们富有的时候，5美元或者20美元对他们来说没什么区别。至少他们觉得有必要回报你，所以表现的体面一些？

Delusional - for me - would be “give us your food, because we are richer and better than you and deserve to be treated as gods.”

对我来说，妄想症就是“把你的食物给我们，因为我们比你更富有，更优秀，值得被当作神来对待。”

joe_thermostat_darcy Joe darcy 

Oh my god thats amazing

哦，我的上帝，太神奇了

onthelevel54e

Yup. Trump gets caught in another lie. FAKE NEWS!

是的，特朗普又被揭穿了一个谎言。假新闻！

Letsnotdocorn101

My brother believes that he should never have a GF because they always get old and only wants to be with teenagers. He is almost 40.

我哥哥认为他不应该有女朋友，因为认为女朋友终归会变老，他只想和年轻的女人在一起。他现在快40岁了。

CinnamonSugarCream 

That is… unsettling.

这真是… 令人不安。

komnenos 

At least he sounds self aware of his situation. Has he ever had a love life?

至少他听起来对自己的处境有自知之明。他之前谈过恋爱吗？

原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译：ycb1990 转载请注明出处

[dexed] 

More than 1 child 

不止一个孩子

Littlebitch0029 

Man, I never want a gf because that’’s social interaction and I don’’t support that, but like damn he’’s seriously messed up.

伙计，我从来不想交女朋友，因为需要社会交往，我不支持那样。但该死的，他的想法真的是一团糟。

DukeMaximum 

Yeah, that’’s something other than delusional. Something worse.

是啊，这可不是妄想，而是更糟的想法。

Wackydetective 

I’’m a receptionist at a community center so I meet a lot of characters. My very first day, I met a lady (trans, this is important.) She zones in on me, she starts telling me that she is the empress of the world. She is worth trillions of dollars. She has 241 children who live in another dimension. 

我是一个社区中心的接待员，所以我能遇到各种各样的人。第一天，我遇到了一位女士(变性者，这很重要)。她开始告诉我她是世界的女王。她身价数万亿美元，有241个孩子生活在另一个维度。

She is waiting on a male celebrity singer to come and get her. She was once shot in the middle of her eyes in an apparent execution attempt on male singer. I stood there in shock. Over time, I start realizing that she is incredibly well versed in history. 

她正在等一位男明星歌手来接她。她有一次被抢射中了眼睛中间，显然是那位男歌手想杀死他。我震惊地站在那里听她讲这些事情。但随着时间的推移，我开始意识到她对历史有着难以置信的了解。

If life had been kinder, she could have been a history professor. I actually begin to enjoy our conversations. Then she starts calling me on my extension. Tells me to quit my job, work for her. I would stand to make a million dollars a week. Then she says, she is actually my Mother and I am a Princess. 

如果生活更和善一些，她本可以成为一名历史教授。我开始享受我们之间的谈话了。然后她开始打我的注意，劝我辞职为她工作。还说我每周可以赚一百万美元。然后她说，她实际上是我的母亲，我是一个公主。

Then I start realizing she is incredibly homophobic and very racist. As she told me out of nowhere I might add, that I could not date black men. She is escorted out but this does not deter her. Then quarantine came into effect. I am told she shows up and calls looking for me. Convinced I have the rona and she needs to protect me.

然后我开始意识到她非常憎恨同性恋，而且非常种族主义。正如她莫名其妙地告诉我的那样，我不能和黑人约会。最后她被保安请了出去，但这并没有阻止她。随后，各州开始执行隔离措施。有人告诉我她曾打电话找我，说我有新冠病毒，她需要保护我。