如果你是一个恶棍，可以选择任何动物与你并肩作战，你会选择什么动物，为什么？_风闻

【来源龙腾网】

If you were a villain and could choose any animal to fight by your side, what animal would you choose and why?

如果你是一个恶棍，可以选择任何动物与你并肩作战，你会选择什么动物，为什么？

评论原创翻译：

ThunderingSacks

I would probably choose a flying one. Either an eagle or owl. But since I’m gonna be a villain one of those giant vultures would suffice.

我可能会选择一个会飞的动物，鹰或者猫头鹰。不过既然我是个恶棍，一只秃鹰就足够了。

ArgentStonecutter 

Owls are a pretty common villain theme in comics.

猫头鹰是漫画中常见的反派动物。

Sal_The_Dragon 

Lion king, I see. Scar loses though

狮子王，我明白了。最后刀疤输了

Just_A_Player_ 

How about a Canadian Goose?

加拿大鹅怎么样？

kingdyl07

Just dont bring him near kids in the zoo

不要让动物园的猩猩接近你们的孩子

dabuku1 

Honey badger. Self-explanatory

蜜獾，理由不言自明

2ndfloorhigh 

Honey badger don’’t give a shit

蜜獾才不在乎呢

tinkrman 

Oh nasty!

哦，真恶心！

StormOfHoney 

Can’’t believe how far down this is!

真不敢相信你们还能选择它！

原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译：zmmyc 转载请注明出处

heartscrew 

The one with the sharpest fangs wins.

尖牙利齿的动物可以胜任。

13Mac_ 13Mac

Komodo dragon… Actually the komodo dragon would be the main villain, and id be the companion animal

科莫多龙… 实际上科莫多龙才是大恶棍，我只是它的伴侣动物

Gden 

I can see it the hero beats you down and you laugh and say “oh you thought I was the boss” and the Komodo stands on two legs and starts laughing

我脑补的场景是，剧中的英雄把你打倒，你笑着说“哦，你不会以为我是大反派吧” ，然后科莫多龙站起来开始大笑

zender23

But in animation it wont look that good

但是在动画片中，它看起来不会那么和谐

80000_days 80000天

Black panther. lethal, stealthy, agile, badass AF…

黑豹，致命性和隐蔽性强，动作敏捷，跳的还高.。

Sal_The_Dragon 

Checks all the villain criteria

检查所有的恶棍符合标准

primepio 

So you’re an evil Drizzt Do’urden?

所以你是一个邪恶的小精灵？

Garg_and_Moonslicer 

Would he have a Vibranium suit?

他会有一套振金服吗？

ZeiglerJaguar 

Leopard or jaguar?

美洲豹还是美洲豹？

echoAwooo 

Yah but Guenhwyvar isn’’t going to be happy with you.

是的，但是关海法和你在一起是不会快乐的。

原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译：zmmyc 转载请注明出处

PaperbackBuddha 

Sea slug.

海蛞蝓。

Nobody would be expecting that.

没有人会想到这一点。

Dolliiy 

When hippos shit, they spin their tails in order to spread it all over the place. The radius they cover can reach up to 10 meters.

当河马拉屎的时候，它们会转动尾巴，以便把屎撒得到处都是。它们覆盖的半径可达10米。

real_zexy_specialist 

This is clearly the best answer. Thick, semi-armored skin. Razor sharp teeth. Don’t take shit.

这显然是最好的答案。身体厚实，半披甲的皮肤，锋利的牙齿，还不说废话。

cidiusgix

Finally a decent answer. Nothing fucks with a hippo.

终于有个像样的答案了，河马真是无恶不作。

snackattack747

Vicious bastards

恶毒的混蛋

xaeromancer 

Apparently it’’s the third deadliest creature on the African continent.

显然它是非洲大陆第三致命的生物。

Only mosquitoes and people kill more people.

只有蚊子和人才会杀死更多的人。

Erebus_Zero Erebus zero

Provide me with meth and I’m in

给我提供冰毒，我就加入

Prometheus_Turati

To be honest, the Florida man will probably just build you an airplane out of Bud Lights and crash into your ex’s house while fighting an alligator while singing the 

Star Spangled Banner. Overall, good choice

老实说，佛罗里达人可能会用百威之光给你造一架飞机，然后一边和鳄鱼搏斗，一边唱着星条旗永不落，最后开飞机撞上你前妻的房子。总的来说，这是个不错的选择

Zer0M0tivation 

that’s too op, you need a nerf

这波操作太骚了，你需要一个实力稍弱的伙伴

DownvoteMasterhehe 

Animals mate not monsters

动物交配不出怪物

Marmitecashews 

If only real animals are allowed, an elephant.

如果只能选真实的动物，那就选一头大象。

If made up animals are allowed, a demon elephant.

如果虚构的动物也能选的话，那就选一头恶魔大象。

Hegemooni 

Metal as hell

铁石心肠

ItsAlways2EZ 2ez

Ancient psychic tandem war elephant

古老的通灵双人战象

Cowboy_Spongebob 

If made up animals are allowed I’m taking a dragon or a big ass lion

如果虚构的动物也可以的话，我会选一条龙或者一头大屁股的狮子

technitaur 

A Cape Buffalo. They’’re massive tanks and they also understand the concept of revenge. Supposedly, they can [remember] an individual years after being 

wounded/threatened, and will do everything they can to hunt down and kill the person.

南非水牛。他们有着坦克般的体型，也懂得复仇的概念。据说，他们能够记住使它们受伤或者威胁它们的人好多年，并且会尽一切可能追捕并杀死这个人。

And also they’’re the closest thing to a minotaur I could have as a real-world animal.

同时，它们也是我所能拥有的最接近于现实世界动物的牛头人。

Tartaras1

So they’’re essentially oversized crows. Crows also seem to understand the concept of revenge, except what they lack in body mass they make up for in numbers, turning an entire flock against you.

它们本质上是超大型的乌鸦。 乌鸦似乎也懂得复仇的概念，体重虽然不足，但是赢在数量多，可以让整个乌鸦群一起攻击你。

frog_without_a_cause 

A raccoon. Better yet, make it a pack of raccoons, each with its own specific skillset.

一只浣熊。更好的办法是，选一群浣熊，每只浣熊都有自己独特的技能。

kiltedpastor 

I read that wrong at first. I was trying to figure out why trash pandas needed a skillet.

我一开始读错了，我想弄明白为什么垃圾熊猫需要一个平底锅。

原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.com 翻译：zmmyc 转载请注明出处

SexDrugsNskittles 

While skimming this comment I had to do a double take because I thought you said the goose was DTF. Haha

在浏览这个评论的时候，我不得不重新审视一下，因为我以为你说这只鹅是 DTF。 哈哈

KENPACHI-KANIIN 

Grizzlies. They’re tanks. A full grown exemplary grizzly bear is prolly worth a lot more than any who goes face to it. And they look cuddly

灰熊。他们就是坦克。 一只成年的灰熊比任何面对它的人都更有价值。它们看起来也很可爱

EDIT 1: wow, never knew this would get upvoted that much. I change my mind, i’m going with kodiak bears instead

编辑1: 哇，从来没想到这个会得到这么多的支持。如果我改变主意，我会选科迪亚克熊

MaynardJ222 222

Why not Polar?

为什么不是极地？

atomicsoar 

I’’d go with a Kodiak, they’’re grizzlies on steroids and I love them. A bit less cuddly looking but if I’’m a villain that’’s fine lol.

我会选科迪亚克，它们是打了类固醇的灰熊，我爱他们。 看起来不那么可爱，但如果我是一个恶棍，面相好不好看无所谓，lol。

Subliminal_Rose 

Bears are that perfect mix between an absolute bone crushing machine and a derpy-faced ball of fur.

熊是骨头粉碎机和皮毛球的完美结合。

twentyplusfortynine 

Get near these huggable cuties and they will turn you into noodle.

接近这些小可爱，它们会把你捏成面条。

TheScienceGiant 

False. Black bear.

错，是黑熊。

MaynardJ222 222

Canadian Goose. Just 1 is fine.

加拿大鹅，一只就行了。

Iwinyoul0se 4. iwinyouloul0se

Dude it’’s supposed to be a sidekick not the actual villain…

伙计，这是选一个帮手，不是选真正的大反派..。

Hq3473

Quick primer:

快速入门:

Canada Goose

加拿大鹅

Canadian goose

加拿大鹅

amborg 

I scared off TWO Canadian geese that were messing with my friend’s dog the other day. I actually was really proud of that. Apparently if you also act like an angry goose it really freaks them out.

前几天，我吓跑了两只调戏我朋友狗的加拿大鹅。我真的为此感到骄傲。 显然，如果你也表现得像一只愤怒的鹅，这真的会吓坏他们。

OhHelloPlease

If you got a problem with Canada Gooses you got a problem with me and I suggest you let that one marinate!

如果你对加拿大鹅不爽，那就是对我不爽，我建议你把它腌一下！

InauspiciousGroan 

You monster!

你这个怪物！

Astheperfectmoon 

You evil bastard. Pure genius. I would flee at first honk.

你是一个邪恶的混蛋，也是一个天才。我一听到喇叭声就会逃跑。

buddycatz 

I don’t mess with a Canada goose, even my dogs knows not to mess with a Canada goose…

我不会惹加拿大鹅，甚至我的狗都知道不要惹加拿大鹅..。

_Goose_ 

What about a British goose. Asking for a friend…

英国鹅怎么样? 替朋友问问..。

MyCodeNameIsBryan 

Oof.. I came here thinking something poisonous, or venomous but I never thought to choose something toxic.

我来这里的时候想的都是有带毒的动物，但是我从来没有想过要选择有毒的动物。

Good choice!

不错的选择！

Azmedon 

A white tiger because they look awesome.

一只白虎，因为它们看起来很威猛。

shroom2021

A crab named citizen snips

一只名叫“公民”的螃蟹尖叫起来

Edit: holy crap! My first award for a futurama reference. Thanks!

编辑: 我的天哪! 我的第一个未来学参考奖。谢谢！

Haggie 

An elephant who never forgets… to kill

一头永远不会忘记… 杀戮的大象

King_Rhymer King rhymer

CITIZEN SNIIIIIIIPPSSSSS!!!!!

公民狙击！

WhetForAnOmelette 

Courage the cowardly dog

胆小的狗英雄

XavierMendel

The hero lies broken on the ground, gun pressed against their forehead.

英雄摔倒在地，枪顶着他们的前额。

“The things I do for love…”

“我为爱做的事… … ”

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